Integrating

Wow it’s nice to be back here. I took a break from blogging for the past week, but I’ve been sticking with my intention to create more than I consume. I was busy rewriting and rebranding my website, which I finally unleashed into the wild yesterday.

This experience of developing my website was very different from the previous one. Early last year, I launched my first coaching-only site and it was excruciating. I’ve been responsible for the strategy and design of hundreds of websites over the years, from 5-page small business sites to multi-thousand page behemoths. All of those were easier than sharing a part of myself that turned out to be profoundly meaningful and precious to me (I am not a precious person). When I launched that first coaching site, I immediately shared it with a handful of friends – as a form of desensitization therapy to help me get over the vulnerability hangover. It was a very cringe-y time.

I felt a similar discomfort when launching this blog. It was so uncomfortable, in fact, that I kept it completely anonymous for a month. This time, it only took a couple of weeks to become comfortable with this new form of sharing myself.

Writing and designing the most recent incarnation of my website was an entirely different experience. I enjoyed it! I enjoyed the writing, and I enjoyed the personal challenge of integrating the two faces of my professional work – coaching and consulting. Before this version, I had maintained two separate sites, using two versions of my name (Anna and Ania). I didn’t know how to combine the two, because I was still understanding how to integrate parts of me that seemed to be incongruent – the consulting career that I only rarely enjoyed, and the coaching which is indelibly connected to who I am at the core.

This time, I wanted the experience to feel easy and fun, to enliven me versus leave me feeling depleted. I decided to focus on thoughts that aligned with ease and joy, so that my experience would be one of ease and joy. It worked.

♥ Anna

No Limits: Jon Morrow

The way we experience reality comes from the inside out. Circumstances, events, and people outside of us don’t determine our experience – what we think about those things determines how we experience life. This is the story of someone with no limits, even when life seems to be undeniably full of them.


At some point or another, life punches everyone in the face.

The punch may be hard, or it may be soft, but it’s definitely coming, and your success or failure is largely determined by the answer to a single question: how well can you take the punch?

Jon Morrow

Jon Morrow is one of the world’s most successful bloggers. He can work from anywhere in the world, travels whenever he wants, sets his own hours. His businesses bring in seven figures a year and he’s sold some of his blogs for millions of dollars.

Jon was born with the privilege of being male and having light skin.

He was also born with Spinal Muscular Atrophy, so he’s almost completely paralyzed. The only part of his body he can move is his face, but he can still feel pain throughout.

Other people with Jon’s condition live in nursing homes and (in his words) are set in front of a television to watch Jerry Springer all day. They don’t socialize, they don’t work, they don’t own businesses, they don’t travel, they don’t live in resorts, they don’t enjoy a full and amazing life.

Since he was born, Jon’s annual medical bills have exceeded $120,000. His parents were not wealthy. He went on Medicare as an adult, but if he earned more than $700 per month he would lose all coverage. He wanted to work, so he worked for a couple years for free.

Eventually he realized he could drastically decrease his medical bills if he lived in Mexico, so he moved there and started a blog. With the income from his businesses Jon was able to pay his own medical bills and live in a beautiful resort in Mexico.

Jon wasn’t supposed to live for more than a few years, but he managed to create a good life for himself against some relatively extreme odds.

Then one day, he was in a car accident that crushed his vertebrae, shattered his legs, and took a year to recover from. This is in addition to already having had pneumonia sixteen times, recovering from more than fifty broken bones, and almost drowning in his own mucus.

How easy would it have been to sink into despair? Or rage against the unfairness? Or maybe even take a little bit too much morphine one day and end it all? But I didn’t. Mostly, I was able to handle it because I’d been conditioned by all the other difficulties of my life, but it was also because I deliberately shifted my perspective.

The people who struggle most are the ones who can’t accept the incessant unfairness of life. They become so consumed with what should have happened, the way other people should have behaved that they become incapable of dealing with reality.

If I allowed myself to be angry at Bill [who caused the accident] for even one moment, I may have sunk into a pit of rage and despair so deep I would’ve never climbed out of it. Instead, I forced myself to say, “Okay, this is my life now. What’s next?” After all, I couldn’t change what happened. The only thing I had control over was how I responded to that change, and the first and most critical response was total and complete acceptance.

Jon Morrow

Jon knows that his experience of life is determined by his thoughts and his perspective, not by his circumstances. When he didn’t like the game, he changed the rules. Maybe he was born with the privilege of knowing this is possible – fortunately, this privilege is available to all of us, already and always. Every one of us has the freedom and ability to choose which thoughts we listen to. We all have the freedom to choose our perspective.

You can be one of those people. I know you can, and so I came here to tell you…

Today, you might feel too poor or sick or unlucky to reach for your dreams, but you’re not.

Today, you might feel too tired or depressed or sad to even try, but you’re not.

Today, you might feel like an outcast, forgotten by your friends or family or anyone who might help you, but again, you are not.

You’re still breathing, my friend. That’s all it takes to stage a comeback.

So, say it with me now, would you?

“I will never, ever give up.”

Say it. Believe it.

And then recognize you’ve begun the journey to becoming totally unstoppable.

– John Morrow 7 Life Lessons from a Guy Who Can’t Move Anything But His Face

♥ Anna

We’re All That

I had another interesting conversation with my friend Joseph. This particular exchange left me quite a bit perplexed. We were talking about the concepts of universal intelligence, innate wisdom, intuition.

Joseph doesn’t believe these things exist as anything other than human conceptual constructs. I would have agreed with him, had we had the same conversation about five years ago. Strangely, I can’t remember exactly when my perspective shifted or how.

As we dissected these concepts, I found it difficult to explain or justify my belief in them.

When I talk about these things with other people, they almost immediately know what I’m referring to and don’t question it. Occasionally, someone might accept the concept but not the way it relates to themselves. Meaning, some people accept the idea of universal intelligence or innate wisdom, but don’t tend to extend the idea to themselves. Universal intelligence is out there, but somehow they aren’t part of it.

Joseph, on the other hand, knew what I was talking about but simply does not believe universal intelligence represents anything real.

These concepts often sound spiritual or woo-woo. However, they do represent easily observable phenomena grounded in science – an acorn turns into an oak tree; a sperm and egg become a human; birds migrate; leaves change colors in the fall.

“Intelligence” implies there is a designer, a god, a universal force. But there doesn’t have to be.

“Universal intelligence” doesn’t have to mean anything cosmic or spiritual, it don’t have to have any great meaning at all.

I think it’s crazy amazing that an acorn turns into an oak tree, that billions of hearts are beating in this moment, that I have two children who grew from a few cells, totally on their own, without any input (beyond the initial) or thought or planning or project management on my part. Of course, these phenomena themselves are entirely neutral, they don’t have any inherent meaning on their own. But to me, they’re amazing.

I feel profound awe and peace, knowing I am part of whatever it is that makes these things happen. That I am made of that. That I am that. It doesn’t matter a bit where that comes from. It doesn’t have to come from anywhere or anyone or anything. Just that is enough – just the fact that all these things happen, all the time and everywhere, and I’ve been part of it all along. Without any effort at all. Not because I’m special – but because I am that. We all are.

A New Thought Appeared

Last night I got about three hours of sleep. My sweet nine-month-old boy finally started sleeping well about a month ago. His sister slept through the night by three months, but at this point we’re thrilled when the boy sleeps until 5am.

For the past few nights, though, he’s been waking up screaming at around 10pm. Last night it continued for several hours. I finally fell asleep at three in the morning. Two hours later I woke up to baby’s insistent cries for mama.

I dragged myself out of bed with sandpaper eyeballs that seemed to have been propped open like A Clockwork Orange.

As soon as I stood up, an angry groaning thought whacked my weary mind: “GOD I am so exhausted, and now I have to feed this baby.”

As I walked to the baby’s room, a new thought appeared: “I am so exhausted, and yet I get to feed this baby. Every morning I get to feed this sweet, adorable little chunker whose mama I am so lucky to be.”

Nothing actually changed out there in the world.

My circumstances were still the same – it was 5am, I was sleep deprived, and facing another long day of trying to be an awake and present parent to a four-year-old and nine-month-old while keeping the house halfway hospitable, making sure everyone eats something resembling food, and trying to grow my business.

Something major changed inside of me, though.

With a simple new thought, my experience transformed. Instead of feeling angry and resentful, I was full of gratitude and love for this little boy who I get to feed every morning at 5am.

An Easy Way to Change the World

If the only thing people learned was not to be afraid of their experience, that alone would change the world.

– Sydney Banks

You can move from fear to acceptance to appreciation and enjoyment with an understanding of these two fundamentals of human experience:

  1. Our experience is created by our thoughts. Our thoughts create our experience. We create our experience. When you know this to be true (in your bones, not just in your head), you realize you are not at the mercy of the world around you. You realize that you are free.
  2. Beyond our thoughts and feelings and circumstances is who we really are. We are made of the same stuff as the stars, the ocean waves, the acorn that always grows into an oak tree. We have unfailing access to this infinite creativity and wisdom because it’s what we’re made of.

♥ Anna